I love my husband. We have been married for over three years and are raising two wonderful boys together. Sometimes, in moments of stress and anxiety, I say stuff to my husband like, “The floor needs vacuumed, the baby has a dirty diaper, the dogs need fed and apparently I am the only one who can do those things!” It’s not true, though. my husband is helpful – he just doesn’t always do what I think he should do, when I think he should do it.
With the new baby in the house I feel like these moments of weakness where I get angry with my husband occur more frequently than they have in the past. I don’t mean for it to happen and I always regret saying it, but it just seems like in the heat of the moment (or in the midst of a baby crying and living on four hours of sleep per night) terrible and hurtful words, accusations and statements fly out of my mouth.
Recently my husband had to go out of town for a week on business. I was left alone to care for two children, two dogs and two cats. Easy, right? Moms all across America do it every day. There are plenty of single women out there raising families without the support of another. I was confident in my ability as a mother and wife that I would be able to handle it!
The first night was fine, great even. Homework was completed, family was fed, everyone was bathed and we even took the dogs on a walk! The rest of the week wasn’t quite so flawless. On Tuesday we all woke up late and were nearly late for school, too, and we didn’t get a chance to take the smelly trash to the curb for trash day. On Wednesday, the baby had peed through his diaper in the middle of the night resulting in a bath using wipes (with every intention to bathe him that evening), and one of the cats got sick on the carpet and of course , we had no carpet cleaner. On Thursday we had cereal for dinner and the baby had to sleep on a towel (I had forgotten that he had peed through his outfit the night before and soaked his sheets). Friday came and the only dishes I had washed all week were the breast pump parts that I use daily. The house had turned into one giant playroom. And the baby hadn’t had a bath since Monday. I felt like even the animals were looking at me like, “What’s going on around here?!”
That evening when my husband finally got home, I was ready for a long, hot bath and a glass of wine. I guess when he walked in the door he knew I had had a rough week because he immediately ordered us all a pizza and began putting our house back together. After getting the kids fed, bathed and to bed I got a little massage and got to take my much needed bath. I don’t take enough time during the week to show my husband how much I really do appreciate everything he does, in fact, sometimes I forget how helpful it is just to have another person there. His time away taught me to really appreciate all the little things he does do to help. Being a super mom takes a super dad flying beside me!